9.28.2002

 

I have had the amazing fortune to have made out/slept with/hooked up/gone home/dated some amazing people in my day, and in large part, I'm still in contact with most of the people who fall within that list. A few of those people are more noteworthy than others for a variety of reasons, but in some way, each of them will remain a pleasant memory in my nighttime visions.

My last girlfriend is a great example of how I manage to get involved with the coolest ladies.

She and I "broke up" about two months ago, though I hesitate to call it a break up because it was the easiest separation I've ever had and I cannot imagine ever having something that easy happen again. We were both getting ready to start new lives in different corners of the country, so when we started dating, I think both of us knew that we would not be a long-term thing to begin with. But as we got settled into our relationships, we started to learn that we have a lot of little differences, which are flexible if you're not as stubborn as I am, and we want radically different things out of the next five years of our respective lives. So we very amicably decided to go our separate ways when we both moved.

Since that time I've spoken to her or emailed her or some other sort of contact almost every day. I miss her a lot. And while I normally hesitate to say such things, at the moment I feel absolutely comfortably in saying that I consider no one more close to me (outside of my family, but those two categories cannot ever compete against each other). I think our relationship is still a little ambiguous in some ways. Late at night I think about cuddling with her and I imagine what it would be like to walk past certain buildings around here holding her hand. I guess we just mean a lot to each other, even though we both recognize that we'd probably be a failure as a long-term couple, even without potential distance complications.

She reads this blog. So I was a little hesitant about announcing I had a date here (and if I hadn't been so nervous, I certainly would not have, but I needed some way to address that energy) because, well, I wasn't sure how she would react. I know if I found out cute boys were asking her out (which they no doubt are, or are least planning on doing) and she was going out, I'd feel ... well, I don't know how I would feel about it. Not jealous, and not hurt, not disappointed or even forgotten. I don't know. I think I might utter an "oh" and just brood on it for an hour without ever coming to a conclusion on what it means. Very weird. Anyway, I was worried of provoking some similar reaction in her.

Instead she writes me today wanting to know all about my date, and she asks me if "we" like my date. And by we she means both of us, because if I like her, than so does she. She was all smiles when I said I had a great time Thursday night. How cool is that?

Yep, I know some cool people. Don't think that's a reflection on me. Just good luck.